Friday, September 15, 2023

Giblets in Thirteen Easy Steps

How to Cook Giblets, in 13 Easy Steps 

Based on experience

1.  Open packaging on your bird carcass.  Remove the bloody bag of giblets from the interior of the bird carcass. Realize that this means that the hopeful statement on the package “may not contain giblets” was a deception.

This bird does NOT contain giblets

2. Call up to napping spouse, “Do you want the giblets, or should I just throw them away now?” Hope for a good answer.  However, like many things in life, the answer is not the hoped-for one.  Reach for the smallest saucepan and chuck the giblets bag into the saucepan to deal with later.

3.  Prepare bird and put in oven, hopefully on time.  Putter around or read a book or take a nap.

Chef and bird

4.  Suddenly realize you left giblets in pot, outside the fridge.  Rush to kitchen in time to prevent later food poisoning.

Gigundo roasted mushroom caps, cooked by my brother. 
No harm if ingredients left at room temperature for a while.
Decidedly not giblets.

5.  Remove giblets from bag, plop into the pot, cover with water.

6.  Put it on the stove, and turn burner to highest heat.  Cover with lid.

7.  Walk to another room to write about how to cook giblets.

8.  Reverie interrupted by sounds of pot boiling over.  Rush to kitchen in time to prevent disaster.  Clean up mess.  Lower temp on the burner and put the giblet pot back on the stove.  Cover with lid.  

9.  Now that 15 minutes has elapsed, pull the roasting bird from the oven and cover it with foil Turn oven temperature from hellish to quite hot. Return bird to oven.  Check giblets - the water has ceased boiling so turn the burner up a bit.  

10.  One hour later, remember the giblets (O Best Beloved).  Turn the burner off.  Put the giblets into a bowl and place in refrigerator for later.

11.  Two weeks later, remove giblets from back of refrigerator and discard.

12.  Swear that you will absolutely not cook the giblets next Rosh Hashanah/Thanksgiving/other holiday.

13.  Repeat annually, or more often if needed.

May you have a sweet year.