Friday, January 7, 2011

Reducing global warming, one fat cow at a time

My plan was to reduce our meat consumption by making more tofu dishes.  I saw some tofurkey sausages at the grocery, but forcing tofu to masquerade as meat just doesn’t cut it for me.  I want to learn how to make a cuisine where tofu feels at home, like the Pad See Ew I had at the Thai restaurant.  Despite its unfortunate name, it was delicious.

My battle against global warming began with finding a tofu recipe on the internet.  For many recipes I noticed that in the comments, people said things like, “I made this recipe, but I used chicken instead of tofu, and where it calls for broccoli I used mushrooms, and I put in salt and thyme instead of soy sauce.”  America, if this is what you are doing with tofu recipes you are missing the point! 

Usually I am suspicious of recipes from the internet, but I proceeded boldly, keeping my lofty mission in mind.  I found a recipe called “Hot and Spicy Tofu.” 

I had an inkling of how the meal would be received when my husband came home from work, saw this dish of bean threads on the counter, and said, “Oh, look, it’s a bowl full of glass.”

The “Hot and Spicy Tofu” turned out to be neither hot nor spicy.  My husband said, “You know, this recipe would be pretty good if you leave out the soy sauce, substitute cream of mushroom soup, use chicken instead of tofu, and put French fried onions on the top.  Oh, yeah, and you should add some green beans.” 

Yet another culinary failure for the Common Household Mom.   Then I admitted to the family that I had been trying to fend off global warming with this recipe. My confession prompted this exchange:  

Husband:  “Eating tofu reduces global warming?”
Me: “We are reducing our consumption of meat.”
Son:  “Yeah, cows contribute to global warming.  They –”
Me:  “The details on that are not something we are going to discuss at the dinner table.”
Husband: “But if I eat MORE meat, then there are FEWER cows around to contribute to global warming.”
Oldest Daughter, exasperated:  “Dad!”
Husband:  “In order to get the meat, they have to kill the cow.  Fewer cows!”

There ensued a discussion of how many cows my husband could eat, and if increasing his cow consumption would reduce the cattle herds enough to have an effect on global warming.

My noble attempt to reduce global warming failed.

But no, I am not ready to give up on this.  Does anyone have a good tofu recipe?  Please send.

Hot and Spicy Tofu - the Common Household Version


Angie Kay Dilmore said...

Years ago, I attempted to add some tofu to spaghetti sauce, instead of ground beef, as Andrew is, more or less, a vegetarian, and needs alternate sources of protein. Sadly, the fam didn't buy it.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I got nothing....I'm a grilled cheese girl.