Common Household Husband (eagerly): I went to a really interesting lecture today!
Other members of the household: Pass the food, please.
Common Household Husband (even more eagerly): Does anyone want to talk about incontinence tonight?!
Oldest Daughter: What’s that?
Youngest Daughter: Incompetence?
Me, trying to head him off at the pass: No, we do NOT want to talk about that.
Oldest Daughter: What is it?
Husband: It’s the loss of bladder control.
Oldest Daughter: No, we DON’T want to talk about that.
Husband: But I went to a really interesting talk today about incontinence.
We managed to steer the conversation to a different topic for a while. But once Oldest Daughter had asked her usual, “Can I be excused to take my shower?” and left the table, my dear husband launched into the topic of incontinence. He was pretty excited about what the speaker had to say. To whit:
It used to be assumed that incontinence was a normal part of aging, and that nothing could be done about it. More recent research shows that isn’t true.
There are many different conditions associated with incontinence, and a lot of them have nothing to do with the bladder itself.
It’s hard to get people to tell their doctor about incontinence, because it’s embarrassing, and people assume that nothing can be done about it. But if people would only tell the doctor, then something could be done about it.*
He went on and on, until Youngest Daughter said, “Daddy, I think you should stop talking and go play the Wii.”
He said, “Go take a wee?”
*See your doctor. She might recommend Kegel exercises, while sitting in the car waiting to pick up teenagers.