Hands off, you jagoffs!

 Sunday April 6, 2025

Yesterday, April 5th, was a very good day.  As good a day as I could hope for given the current situation.  The spring blooms are starting to show, and so is The Resistance.

TL;DR - our Hands Off rally was a huge success.  We showed up, we listened, we yelled, we sang, we brandished signs, we marched.  I hope to God somebody noticed.  Maybe at least God noticed, although the track record might not be too promising there.  According to the Bible it took God 130 to 400 years (depending how you count it) to notice the Israelites in slavery.   Regardless, I’m in it now for the long haul.

If you went to a Hands Off rally on April 5th, I would love to hear about your experience.

 

Photo credit: Corey Buckner

The crowd extends well down the street in both directions.  Estimated attendance: 6,000+.  That’s probably me standing next to the sound equipment table, behind the pillar on the right.  Or not.  But that’s where I stood when I wasn’t trying to herd the general public off the portico.

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The excruciatingly long version, which I write mainly so I can remember it later:

Three rallies in Pittsburgh

The leaders of seven grassroots groups in Pittsburgh worked together to hold one of three “Hands Off!” rallies here in Allegheny County.  (The “Hands Off!” rallies were a nationwide effort.)  

My grassroots group is Progress PA, (or if that doesn’t work you can find us on Facebook, on Instagram.  PPA is also on Bluesky but haven’t posted much there yet.  I and my good friend J, the PPA Treasurer and person who holds the group together, helped with planning.  

Our rally was held at the City-County building in downtown Pittsburgh – we had about 6,000 attendees.  At the same time, another grassroots group, called “50501” (Fifty-fifty-one), held their rally at Schenley Plaza near the University of Pittsburgh. I haven’t seen any attendance estimate for that.  

Then later in the afternoon, there was a Hands Off! rally in Shadyside at the corner of Fifth and Shady Aves, hosted by a woman who has been bravely holding a one-woman daily protest at that location – that one had about 1,200 in attendance.

5 PM rally crowd at Fifth and Shady Aves.   I wasn’t at this one. 

 Photo credit: Rory M. 

Who was there

Our downtown rally had 10 (!) people slated to speak, including Conor Lamb, my former congressperson, and candidate for US Senate in 2022, who lost to John Fetterman in the primary.  Most Democrats I know now keenly rue that loss.  Only one of our speakers couldn’t be there.  

Other speakers were a disability rights activist, a reproductive rights storyteller, a trans activist, a public health advocate, a queer activist, a union leader, a chemistry prof, and the executive director of the PA Democratic Party (he did the most cussing of all of them).

Several members of Progress PA were able to attend, and helped with carrying stuff and herding wanderers off the portico.  

Pittsburgh Raging Grannies.  Photo credit: Heather Mull

We also had The Pittsburgh Raging Grannies, a singing group that writes alternative progressive lyrics to well-known songs.  At one point they led the crowd in singing the first verse of “America the Beautiful” (regular lyrics).  It was heartwarming to hear our huge crowd of patriots sing.  Then they launched into their own lyrics, of which here is one verse: 

How beautiful it could have been

Without unending greed,

And special interest politics

Have made our nation bleed.

America! America!

Where is the Bill of Rights?

All our dreams have been replaced

By rampant corporate might.

Chantress

For our Hands Off rally, I was put in charge of chants - pulling from various sources and writing some original ones.  I had about 10 days’ warning, but found the portion of my brain concerned with rhyme and meter is not what it had been.  (For instance, I wrote this in 2013.)  

I did come up with a chant in which the crowd’s response was “Hands off, you jagoffs!”  Jagoff is a local derogatory term which means “jerk” but it is more insulting than that.  

In high school, I would have been voted “Least Likely to Raise Hand in Class” and definitely “Least Likely to Stand In Front of a Crowd and Shout”.   But incipient fascism calls all of us to strange duty – I was tasked with doing crowd warmup with those chants, before the event start-time. 

Before the rally I printed off 3 copies of my 15-pages of chants, in 14-point font.  I didn’t have time to memorize anything.  I also did not have much time to practice, because these days I’m:

• writing snarky-furious letters to my Senators, 

• managing our grassroots group Progress PA 

• helping to plan for three more grassroots upcoming actions,

• learning better how to use the voter list app,

• getting ready to door knock on behalf of School Board candidates, 

• working as a member of the anti-racism team at church, 

• singing in the Lenten choir, 

• cooking for Passover,  

• reading books. 

All good stuff.  But overwhelming. Oh yeah, and paid work (part-time).  

I put my chant papers on a clipboard that says [Younger Daughter’s Name], glad to be taking some family support with me.

What I brought

In addition to personal items (keys, cell phone, tiny wallet w/drivers license,

a bit of cash, a credit card, bandaids, asthma inhaler) I also brought:

• Cap in case of light rain

• Umbrella in case of heavy rain

• Sturdy comfortable shoes

• pb&j sandwich

• a very old box of Froot Loops that I found in the closet

• Water bottles

• Kleenex

• Lip balm

• Cough drops

• 3 printed copies of rally chants

• 5 letters from me to my Senators, including 3 handwritten, 2 printed

• Tiny flags: US, trans, LGBTQ

• Bigger American flags (about 25-inch pole, so still not huge)

• Rally sign with message (double-sided), wrapped in plastic.  I hate using the foamcore and doubly hate wrapping it in plastic, but heavy rain was predicted and for this one time, I didn’t want to mess around with a floppy peeling sign.

Before the end of the rally, I had left the bigger American flags behind

in a pile somewhere, and the people who had borrowed my rally chants

papers were at the opposite end of the march from me.  I only used my

rally sign during the march, as my role prevented me from holding on to

it during the speeches.  

Rally Day

On Saturday my good friend J and I arrived at the City County building at 11:30 AM and helped set up stuff.  We soon found our friend B, who also helped set up. At 12:15 PM I led chants for 15 minutes.  When I mentioned Senator Fetterman, there was a HUGE growl/ groan/ boo which took me aback – special animosity for our Dem Senator who has collaborated with the Musk-TrumPutin regime.  

Then the rally started in earnest at 12:30.  My voice was hoarse by then.  After a while I began to feel dehydrated, so I drank one whole bottle of water.  Not a mistake, but there were consequences later.  The rain held off.

Leading rally chants before the event starts in earnest

(sign language interpreter on the right).    Photo credit: Heather Mull

My other assignment was to keep random people from the crowd off of the portico, for the security of the speakers.  My friends J and B also helped with this.  It proved to be a near impossible task. A few people from the crowd came up on the portico to ask if they too could speak.  Ummm, NO.  One person told me she was dissatisfied with the first speakers because they hadn’t been using expletives.  “I just want to say ‘Fuck Donald Trump’,” she calmly explained.  (Later speakers used plenty of expletives.)  A few people just wanted a photo from up there. 

My former Congressperson (now private citizen) Conor Lamb speaks.  Photo credit: Heather Mull.

I heard almost none of the speeches, because the sound was distorted on the portico where I was.  I can tell you with certainty, though, that scientists speaking at rallies need to shorten their speeches.  I’ve been to several rallies now with scientists speaking 10-15 minutes.  Somebody please tell the scientists to just prepare an abstract!  No supporting evidence needed at a rally.  

Whenever there was a pause in the speaking, someone in the crowd would start their own chant.  Everyone was energized.

A few times I did go down into the crowd, to get some photos. The crowd extended way down the street both ways, and also into the parking lot across the street.   A congenial and yet angry bunch of people.  

The rally was a huge success.   Church friends and other friends later confirmed that whereever they were in the crowd, everyone was pleasant, friendly, and helpful.  The speakers and chants were invigorating.   The crowd stayed for a whopping 90 minutes listening to speeches.  I felt weak and dehydrated again so I drank more water.  There was one incident of fainting (not me).  One Progress PA board member, T, was nearby; T’s spouse L, who is a nurse, was able to assist until the paramedics arrived.  Thank you, L!  Such events often have at least one fainting incident. 

National reports noted that none of the Hands Off rallies around the country included violence.  (Unlike Jan 6, 2021.)

Marching to Mellon Square

The speeches ended, and we marched up Grant Street, turned the corner and marched down Liberty Ave to Mellon Square (which is not the same as Mellon Park or Bakery Square).  Waiting for us at Mellon Square were the giant Trump Chicken, and a tent with a place to drop off letters to be hand-delivered to our Senators. (I dropped off my 5 letters.)  A saintly person brought water bottles for marchers.  I was still parched, so drank more water.

The Trump Chicken.  Photo credit M.H.

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

At Mellon Square we had one more speaker - a rep from an immigrant rights organization, substituting for the original speaker who couldn’t be there.  It started to rain.  By this time my bladder was like to burst, but I ignored it.  The director of the event unexpectedly asked me to lead a few more chants, but my three printed sheets of chants had disappeared, so I had to read them off my phone, in the rain.  We did a few, including this one (sing-chant):

I don’t know but I’ve been told

The people here are mighty bold!

And there’s one thing clear to me

The people here have unity!

Lies and threats will not divide

The People marching side by side!

Which I discovered afterwards is based on a US Marine Corp running cadence!  

Leading chants at Mellon Square,
near the end of the rally.

Finally at around 3 PM our resistance action ended.  My bladder said,

"Hey, it's been 4.5 hours." We trudged to the car and J sped us home

to her waiting bathroom.  I have to remember next time not to have

ANY TEA AT ALL the morning of a rally.

We will see if anyone pays attention to our effort.  Regardless of

what we do, spring has arrived and the trees are blooming beautifully. 

While I do like spring, my favorite season always is the fall

… of the patriarchy.