Thursday, March 3, 2016

Food and Calendar Conversations

Recent Common Household commentary about food, including food as it relates to holidays both secular and religious. 

Me:  “There is banana bread here.”
Son:  “I don’t think I’ve ever had banana bread.  Is it like monkey bread?”
Me:    “No.”
Son:  “Or is it just bread for monkeys?”

* * * * *

Common Household Husband:  “To me, pie is just something you eat when you have no cake.”

* * * * *

The Common Household Son was complaining that there were no more frozen waffles, which is what he usually eats for breakfast.  I said, “Can’t you eat cereal?  Every red-blooded American eats cereal for breakfast.”   Younger Daughter shouted from the other room, “Who says our blood is red?!”

* * * * *

Me:  “What kind of cheese do you want for your sandwich?”
Husband:  “There’s some low salt, low fat, low self-esteem cheese in the fridge.”

* * * * *

Me:    “On Tuesday we are going to the Pancake Dinner at church.”
Husband:   “Why are they serving pancakes?”
Younger Daughter:  “On Tuesday it is the tradition to use up all the fat.  Before Lint.”
Husband (thinking of pre-Passover traditions):  “You mean, you go through the cupboards with a feather and brush away all the fat?”
Me:   (speechless)
YD:  “What?!  There’s no feather involved in Lint.”
Husband (rhapsodic about Passover):  “As a people, we have gone through the cupboards with a feather. … How long is Lent?  Is it a 30-day countdown?”
Me:  “Lent is 40 days, not including Sundays.”
Husband (explaining the Jewish calendar):  “You know there are two months of Adar this year.  How does that affect Lent?  Maybe Lent is 80 days this year instead of 40 days?”

* * * * *

Me: (reading the newspaper about an event for Presidents’ Day):  “Oooh!  A Cherry Pie hike!  What a great title for a hike.”
Husband:  “Is there a chocolate cake hike?”
Me:    “No.  George Washington was not famous for chocolate cake.”
Husband:  “I have no use for it if it doesn’t involve chocolate cake.”


4 comments:

Angie said...

Great, now I'm hungry!

Karen (formerly kcinnova) said...

Your family cracks me up!

According to my husband, cake takes a distant second to pie. It's all about the celebration pies around here.

The Crislers said...

Low self-esteem cheese! That is perfect. I love your family conversations. Please don't ever stop transcribing them.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I'm glad to say we have only healthy self-esteem cheese at our house. Your family is such a hoot.